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In as much as obligation towards parents has been
strictly enjoined upon children, Islam has also instituted duties towards
children. The Holy Prophet (sallal laahu alaihi wasallam) laid down some
guiding factors with regard to the upbringing and maintenance of children,
especially female children.
The Holy Prophet (sallal laahu alaihi wasallam) had
raised the status and position of females in Society, and promised the Muslims
success and high reward for upbringing their daughters with the necessary
education and training to face marriage and lead a decent family life.
The father has been instructed to provide for the maintenance
of his infant children, whilst both parents have been instructed to provide
education for their young children beginning first with the study of the Holy
Quran. Of all the properties and which children inherit from their parents, the
best is good manners. Parents have been instructed to spend for the well-being
of their children. The Hadith states there is no better cause than to spend for
the well-being of their children.
If in the case of the father's death, the mother spends her
time bringing up the minor children till they attain maturity, instead of taking
a second husband, that mother has been assured a place in Paradise next to the
Holy Prophet (sallal laahu alaihi wasallam).
There are Ahadith that state that parents should salute (make
Salaams to) their children when entering the house; and parents should often
express kindness and affection to their children by hugging and kissing them.
The following are Ahadith from the various Kitaabs of Hadith
that refer to duties of parents towards children:
- Muslim Shareef: Hazrat Anas (radi Allahu anhu)
reported that the Messenger of Allah (sallal laahu alaihi wasallam) said:
"Whoever maintains two girls till they attain maturity, he and I will come on
the Day of Resurrection like this, 'and he joined his fingers.'"
- Tirmizi Shareef: Hazrat Jaber bin Samorah (radi
Allahu anhu) reported that the Messenger of Allah (sallal laahu alaihi
wasallam) said: "The teaching of good manners by a man to his son is
better for him that to give a sa'a in charity."
- Sunnan Abu Dawud: Hazrat Auf bin Malik (radi
Allahu anhu) reported that the Messenger of Allah (sallal laahu alaihi
wasallam) said: "I and the woman black of two cheeks shall be like these
two fingers on the Day of Resurrection (Yazid bin Zuraiy pointed out the middle
and fore-fingers), the woman who has been bereft of her husband (but) possessing
beauty and respectability, and who confines herself to (upbringing) her orphan
children till they grow major and die."
- Ibn-e-Majah Shareef: Suraqah bin Malik (radi
Allahu anhu) reported that the Holy Prophet (sallal laahu alaihi
wasallam) said: "Shall I not teach you the best form of charity? -
(maintaining) your daughter who has been returned to you, who has got no earning
member except you."
- Bukhari Shareef and Muslim Shareef: Hazrat Ayesha
(radi Allahu anha) reported that a desert Arab came to the Holy Prophet (sallal
laahu alaihi wasallam) and said: "What! Do you kiss children? But, we
don't kiss them?" Then the Messenger of Allah (sallal laahu alaihi
wasallam) said: "I can't help you since Allah has taken kindness out of
your heart."
- Bukhari Shareef and Muslim Shareef: Hazrat Abu
Hurairah (radi Allahu anhu) reported that the Messenger of Allah (sallal
laahu alaihi wasallam) kissed his grandson Hasan bin Ali (radi Allahu
anhu) in the presence of Aqra bin Habis (radi Allahu anhu), whereupon
Aqra said: "I have ten children and I have never kissed any of them." The
Messenger of Allah (sallal laahu alaihi wasallam) looked towards him and
said, "He who is not kind will not be shown kindness."
- Abu Dawud Shareef: Bara'a (radi Allahu anhu)
narrated: "I came with Abu Bakr (radi Allahu anhu) who was the first to reach
Madina. Hazrat Ayesha (radi Allahu anha), his daughter, was lying in bed on
account of fever. Abu Bakr (radi Allahu anhu) came to her and said, 'How are you
my beloved daughter?' and he kissed her."
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